How and Why Can Cremated Remains Be Divided?
With families now often living far apart and so many options for cremated remains, sometimes there’s a desire to divide ashes (cremated remains, sometimes called “cremains”) into many smaller portions to pay tribute to a family member in several different ways or for scattering or interring in many locations.
Your chosen funeral or cremation provider may be willing to help you divide remains for many uses. If you are responsible for portioning out the remains, we will share some “how-to” tips below.
What to Expect When You Receive Cremated Remains
When you receive cremated remains, it can be helpful to know what to expect. Depending on the size of your loved one, the volume and weight of the remains will be similar to a five-pound bag of flour. The color ranges from white to gray, and the texture is like dusty sand. Ashes are odorless and non-toxic. While we use the term “ashes,” cremated remains are bone fragments ground into a more pleasing texture before being carefully placed in a container and returned to the family.
Receiving the remains can be a very emotional experience, so consider having someone with you when they are delivered or when you pick them up and divide them if you are doing it on your own.
Creative Ways to Use and Divide ‘Ashes’
Many people take a portion of the remains to put in memorial jewelry, an urn, or even to be mixed into tattoo ink. There are dozens of creative memorials using cremated remains. You can also scatter the ashes in places with special meaning for your loved one and family. Parting Stones transform ashes into smooth, polished spheres that are safe to handle and easy to divide for those who want a memorial object.
While some religious traditions dictate that the remains be placed in one permanent location for memorialization, for others, having many options can help satisfy the desire to share among several family members living far apart and having both memorial items and multiple scattering locations for your loved one.
Perhaps Grandma loved a National Park. Or maybe she wanted to be in a cemetery near Grandpa. By dividing the remains, you can scatter cremated remains somewhere special and still have some left for a pendant or a second location.
How to Divide or ‘Portion’ Ashes
1. Gather Your Supplies
To divide the ashes, first gather these supplies:
- Newspaper or a towel
- Scissors
- A funnel or piece of paper wrapped into a cone-shape
- Glue (if you plan to seal the display urn)
- A plastic bag (if you are planning to use a new one)
- Urn, keepsake item, or memorial jewelry
- A mask and gloves
Cremated ashes are non-toxic. Although handling them can be emotional, they do not pose a risk to your health. A mask will help you avoid breathing in small particles, and gloves provide a physical barrier to touching the ashes with your skin. Both are optional.
A small piece of paper wrapped into a cone shape works best for transferring small amounts of cremated ashes into jewelry or small memento items. The directions below will guide you through using ashes to fill an urn, but can be modified to fill smaller items.
3 Options for Transferring ‘Ashes’
You have three options for transferring the cremated remains into a display urn:
- If the opening is wide enough, you can place the entire plastic bag into the new urn.
- You can cut a small hole in a corner of the plastic bag and pour the contents directly into the display urn.
- You can place another clean plastic bag into the new urn and then pour the remains into that bag.
How to Keep Identification Information with Remains
Always keep the metal tag with the remains so that identification never becomes an issue. Additionally, a sticker placed on the bottom of the urn or a piece of paper placed inside with the decedent’s name and date of death can be an even better way of making sure the remains are easily identified in the future.
How to Divide Cremated Remains Step-By-Step
Choose your method for transfer from the three options listed above. Note: A plastic bag (or the original one) will keep ashes from spilling if the urn is tipped over, falls, or breaks.
- Put the display urn on the newspaper or towel and all your tools and temporary urn in close reach.
- Put on a mask and gloves if you choose.
- Open the temporary urn and remove the plastic bag and attached metal tag.
- If you are removing the ashes from the bag, cut a hole in a corner and slowly fill the display urn. You can also place a bag inside and fill it, using paper or a funnel, if needed.
- As we noted above, keep the identification tag with the remains. If any cremated remains have spilled during the transfer, scoop them from the paper or towel underneath and add to the urn.
- If you plan to seal the new urn, wipe the lid with a damp cloth and dry it. Then, place several drops of glue or “super glue” on the rim of the base of the urn and the lid. Screw the lid on and wipe off any excess dirt and glue. This method should work for most ceramic and wood urns, but check the instructions on your chosen glue bottle.
- When you fill your urn or item, you can roll up the newspaper or towel to throw away or wash. Clean up the rest of your supplies. Remove any gloves and mask and wash your hands. Take a deep breath and have a glass of water. You did it!
Finding Comfort Through Memorial Items and Scattering Options
Whether you’ve chosen to place some cremated remains into jewelry or create a glass paperweight or Parting Stones, we hope that having a remembrance item brings you comfort and reminds you of the person you miss. Studies have shown that having a memorial item can help with grief and assist you with focusing on the positive, happier memories.
If you want to divide the ashes to scatter them in many places, we hope that journey – wherever the destinations are – will bring closure for you and your family and pay tribute to your loved one’s hobbies and passions.
For more resources and information, we recommend exploring Cremation Jewelry: A Growing Trend or Creative and Unique Ways to Remember a Loved One with Ashes. If you have any questions or need personalized assistance, find a location near you. We are here to help guide you through your options with care and understanding.